If God wills...

I'm struggling a little theologically, and I think it's a good thing because I'm thinking about God a lot more and not making dumb assumptions. The topic on my mind is suffering, and there have been two voices in my life (one is from my church, while the other is John Piper) that are hammering the point that God not only allows and uses suffering to sanctify people, but He also intends suffering, plans the painful circumstances, and makes sure that suffering occurs in believers' lives. I could provide the links to these sermons, if anyone wishes. John 11 and the book of Job are used primarily to back up their points. I belong to a body of believers that's very concerned with God's sovereignty over all things, so if any suffering happens that opposes His will, that would be perceived as a threat to this aspect of who He is.

What troubles me a little is that a discussion has already been underway at my workplace, where church planters overseas are seeking to counteract what they term as "fatalism" among unreached people groups. For instance, in their countries, when a young person constantly makes stupid choices and dies on his motorcycle, since he wasn't wearing a helmet, his relatives console themselves with, "It is written." I myself have experienced some really crazy driving by foreign drivers, who keep muttering, "If it is God's will, if it is God's will..." as they make crazy, reckless moves into oncoming traffic. They reason that they may drive as bad as they wish because God's will is always going to be done, and they can't die until He wills it. Some of my co-workers want to counteract this philosophy and show that these deaths that keep happening could have been prevented. That they were not predestined.

I'm beginning to sense that I'm being called to adopt a few fatalistic principles--namely, seeing all suffering as God's will, in order to uphold the idea of God's sovereignty. In American Christianity, we don't call it fatalism, though. It's going to be called something more impressive because who wants to be known as a fatalist? I can tell you this--if/when my daughter gets sick, I'm planning to take her to the doctor, believing that God wants to heal her and use medicine, rather than passively waiting for the suffering she's going through to develop her character(?) take its full course and horribly weakens her. God has given me reason, and I'm going to assume, until I know differently, that He expects me to do everything in my power to fight against viruses and predators in her life and mine--even if they've been appointed, ultimately, by Him.

David and his buddy Saul

Last week, I flipped open the Bible hoping to get some kind of wisdom to light my way, and I read a couple chapters in 1 Samuel about the many chances David was seemingly presented in order to kill King Saul while the latter monarch was out constantly trying to kill him. It's almost comical. First, Saul goes to sleep in a cave where David and his men are hanging out; later, Saul chooses the one cave where David is hiding to enjoy his private bowel movement. Can you imagine lying still and quiet right next to the illustrious king while he's doing his business in the dark? Finally, David creeps into Saul's camp, gets all the way into the tent, and he still doesn't kill Saul. Because Saul was "the Lord's anointed," and David trusted that God would take care of Saul Himself. He didn't have to take matters into his own hands and bring sin upon himself.

I thought about how often I'll look at some opportunity that the Lord seemingly drops in my lap, and then I just assume that He wants to give me a gift, and I grab at it--not asking whether it's wise or sinful. It just looks good and easy, so I go for it. David chose not to sin and kill Saul even though it looked like God was repeatedly handing Saul's life over to David for an easy assassination. David waited and chose to suffer for years (choosing hardship for his family and men as well), then God exalted David and brought him into leadership over the country at the appointed time. I admire David's steadfastness and want to look at new opportunities presented to me...slowly. I don't want to kill any Sauls before their time, you might say (or I might).

Dying daily

Last year, I attended a funeral with my wife, Katherine, and we found it difficult to avoid cracking up during one of the "Special Music" moments performed by the departed lady's nephews and niece. You see, they mangled the lyrics of a fairly well-known song in a unique way. The song was by Fernando Ortega, titled "Give Me Jesus," and its performers are supposed to sing:
"In the morning when I rise, in the morning when I rise, in the morning when I rise, give me Jesus."
Instead, these mourning relatives obviously had something else on their minds, as they mistakenly sang (I kid you not): "In the morning when I die, in the morning when I die, in the morning when I die, give me Jesus."
The performance effectively ruined the song for us for the rest of our lives, as we find it pretty impossible to hear the song on the radio without singing along, "In the morning when I die!"
Then yesterday, I was thinking about Jesus' call for his followers to take up their crosses daily and follow Him, and I remembered that song, "In the morning when I die..." and realized that each morning I can choose to "die" to my own desires and perceived needs or live for myself and miss what God wants to give in place of what I'm grasping to own, build, and receive glory through. Having Jesus to fill me up makes it possible to die to self daily. Maybe God speaks to me through incidents like this, or maybe I'm making too much out of very little, but I know that the remade song speaks to me in a new way that most Christian music does not, so I praise God for it.

Lawrence of Arabia

I'm watching this film in pieces with my wife, Katherine (such is the norm in a family with a 7-month-old). Last night, we watched as T.E. Lawrence defied his Arab allies who claimed that the death-by-desertion (in the desert, no less) of a fellow Bedouin who fell off his camel was "written" in the heavens, so they felt no responsibility for going back to look for this one man who would surely die. If they did try, they reasoned, they would surely face the same fate. Lawrence decided to go back for this man who he barely knew--maybe to prove a point: when he returns victorious with the man he saved, he whispers out, "Nothing is written." Appeals to the humanist/rationalist side of me--in some quarters known as the flesh.

Offending and Being Offended

This last week, I took a phone call from a friend and leader at my church who wanted to explain why my church's elders had chosen not to promote a fundraising banquet that my workplace is offering in a couple weeks. The primary reason was an ad that appeared in the NY Times which has fallen under the attack of Dr. John Piper, so it is now getting considerable attention. The ad, which looks like a letter to Muslims, signed by many Christian leaders (including some from my org)--asks Muslims for forgiveness about the Crusades and encourages further dialogue to take place on the basis of Christians' and Muslims' shared tenet--that the One God expects us to love Him and love our neighbors.

The problem is that many Christians don't think Muslims have any real connection with the God whom Christians claim to follow. Because they don't trust in Jesus (yet) we have nothing in common. I happen to believe that Muslims have a lot in common with Jews who also do not accept Jesus as their Messiah. Jews would deny that Jesus is the "Christ" of God. My heart was gladdened that, when I read the NY Times response to "A Common Word," the Christian leaders correctly identified Jesus as the "Christ." I believe that, in doing so, they rightly proclaimed Jesus as the Anointed Son of God. If they had called Jesus a Prophet, equating Him with Mohammed, there'd be a big problem. They didn't go with a simple "Jesus" or "Jesus of Nazareth". His role is made evident, whether Muslim reders accept it or not. I think this was a bold choice that should not be overlooked.

Learning from Peers

This is the one weekend of the year when people from around the country serving as "encouragers of sent ones" come together to stir one another up for love and good deeds. It's a lot of material to devour, and it can be difficult to discern what key points to take away from all that's being taught...and what to ignore. Perhaps the best part of the weekend is being able to pray with others who actually know the challenges I face. I get to see that I'm not alone, that there's people ahead of me whom I can learn from, and remember that God is really in control.

I read John Mark's account of Jesus' death this morning, and I was struck again by Jesus' words, "My God, my God, why have You forsaken Me?" For years, this one verse has been used by Bible teachers I've heard to explain that Jesus was actually divorced from the Father at this time because the full weight of God's wrath was being placed upon Him, and, the argument goes, God's holiness does not dwell in the presence of sin. So here's my question: Was Jesus surprised and actually asking the question "Why" I don't think so. People who heard Him thought He was calling on Elijah. His words echo a psalmist prophesying about Jesus. If that psalm was originally breathed to the psalmist from Jesus, the Word of God, and I believe it was, Jesus was quoting Himself. Soon after He said this, He spoke to His Father, "Into Thy hands I commit My Spirit." That's in another book other than Mark, but it's trustworthy. In Matthew, the Father raises a bunch of people from the dead and causes an earthquake. So how is it that Jesus is claimed to have been abandoned by His Father temporarily? Can you use just one verse to prove it? If it is true that Jesus was "forsaken" for a while, as God was pouring the full weight of sin on Him at the same time, what theological point is upheld? Really, I want to know. Someone tell me. Is it just that God takes sin so seriously that He would not listen to His Son anymore? I want to know more about why it's so important to our faith that the Trinity would be temporarily ceased. And how long was it necessary for this forsaking to happen?

what drink describes you?

Today, I reconnected with a young man I knew and hung out a lot with between 1996 and 2000. I felt the need to apologize for being overbearing and exercising a strong personality over him, expressing many opinions that he probably could have lived without. He was gracious. But then I think, at the very same meeting, it seemed to me that I was falling back into the very same pattern--giving him lots of unsolicited advice. It was like i couldn't help myself. When I asked him afterwards if he had felt uncomfortable during our meeting, he said that I had mellowed a bit--that I was now like "Listerine...but the mint flavor". He later modified that flavor to orange, which sounded like an improvement. I appreciated his honesty and the chance to laugh at myself a bit. At least I wasn't Nyquil.

and another thing...

You might think--from reading my previous post--that I have my mind made up on this issue of whether Muslims worship the one true God of Abraham. I had a coversation yesterday with a pastor, and I asked him, "So do you also think Mormons worship this same God as we do?" He replied, "Certainly not," and he listed all the qualities about the god Mormons believe in--that he was created by a bigger God and there are many other--which negated any claim that they worship the God we claim as one and only. Then I asked him, "But Muslims don't believe in the Trinity or that Jesus was His only begotten Son...how is this so different from Mormons who say they believe in the God of Abraham but add lots of other doctrines?" The pastor said, for himself, that he was prejudiced against Mormons the way many Americans are prejudiced against Muslims. The pastor then talked about how most Americans have no real concept of the Trinity, that they cannot explain it, so, he argued, would we say they don't worship the one true God? I thought he had a point there. For the most part, I am willing to give American churchgoers the benefit of the doubt that they are worshipping the one true God--even when their view of His sovereignty doesn't align with mine or when they hold the Bible in lesser esteem. I usually talk and act like we're talking about the same Heavenly Father. Should I cease believing this? Should I test everyone's faith who doesn't attend my church or Piper's and not just assume their one true God is my one true God? How does Romans 1 and 2 play into all this, wherein Paul says that His invisible qualities are evident to all mankind, so no man has an excuse. If this is the case, should we assume that peoples from all tribes who attribute creation to one divine entity are referring to this God who made the heavens and earth--even if they think wrongly about them because they haven't yet heard about Jesus?

arguing on how to tell the truth to Muslims

I decided to add my voice to a theological discussion under way that involves several members of Frontiers--with whom John Piper has taken exception to. My friend, Dr. Rick Love, the former International Director of Frontiers, is one of the main persons in dialogue with Piper. A discussion began at this website, too, and I encourage you to check out this link and add your own voice. This link leads you right to the commentary, where I wrote today as JRL, but you should look at Justin's original article as well.

The Time is Fulfilled

Reading in the Gospel of Mark, I see that Jesus went to be baptized by John, and then the Father speaks, "This is my beloved Son in whom I am well pleased." What an introduction to ministry! As adopted sons of our Heavenly Father, we may also long for that kind of affirmation. Certainly, we long to hear "I am well pleased" from our earthly fathers. With the help of this spoken blessing, we may feel empowered to represent him/Him as we walk out into the wilderness, among people who don't like us, and to gather others around us (some of whom, like James and John, may need to leave their father behind along with the family business). Jesus didn't begin his real work without this public affirmation from His Father. I wonder how many of the people I am trying to encourage, who have a desire to start ministry overseas, are still waiting for some find of affirmation--if it's not forthcoming from their real father, could it come from someone else who's older in the faith and believes in them?

Wednesday

This afternoon, my team is headed to ASU's Hayden Lawn, and we hope to interact with students at a prayer tent--where people pray 24-7 for weeks. We want to help people pray for people groups that have not yet heard about Jesus.

After hosting a big conference like Take My Life, one of the last things my body wants to do is follow-up work with attendees, but it's a critical component. I need God's grace to help me complete what has been started.

Yesterday, I sat down with three members of the Development team to discuss the next issue of Frontlines, and there were some good ideas flying around the room as we talked about integrating the issue better with its online version. I would really like to complete this issue on time for a change and not grow weary in well-doing.

I have a beautiful and talented wife, an adorable daughter, and a church that loves the work I do. Plus, a workplace environment that's flexible and willing to allow new ideas to be tried (even if they fail)--a good thing once in a while despite what I wrote yesterday. For these things and, most of all, my Lord who wants to be known and already knows me intimately--I have so much wealth for which to be thankful. May the Lord be praised today as I listen for His voice and seek to walk into the good works He has planned in advance for me.

Renewal

I think that blogging won't get done unless I carve out 15 minutes to do it and it alone. For me, that time is 8:15am-8:45am. I want to share two stories:

1) I labored and was planning for several weeks, leading up to the Take My Life Conference (www.takemylife.org), about a large prayer tent my org was going to set up in order to help people at the conference pray for 24 hours straight. I knew that rain would prevent us from putting the tent up, and I checked the weather reports--clear skies predicted. The morning that we were set to erect the tent, clouds came and the rain poured down, so we had to scrap the tent and ask people to pray in a small enclosed prayer chapel instead. I'm not sure how many people did go there to pray, and the announcment was never made that people could pray all night. I thought about the verse in Proverbs 16--"A man plans his way, but the Lord directs His steps." The following week after the conference, I learned that our special guests, who are part of the 24-7 Prayer Movement and were helping to lead the conference...they had asked God to bring rain, as they see rain as a sign of His favor. Interesting.

2) Yesterday, I received some surprising news from a co-worker: a 2-week trip to Central Asia that he had been planning with 3 other couples has now been put on hold because the three couples said they weren't aware of the April departure time, and they weren't sure if the goals of the trip truly aligned with their own. I found this very curious just one month before the proposed trip was going to launch. My co-worker said, --"A man plans his way, but the Lord directs His steps." This time, though, in the way he applied the verse, it had the ring of an excuse for poor planning. Not that he was at fault--but someone somewhere (need to find ouut who) had failed to communicate clearly with the three couples, who we were hoping would emerge as future leaders overseas. Or else they blocked out the word "April" when they heard it and panicked when they realized February was coming to an end.

In the ministry I'm involved with, we pray a lot. We make a lot of plans. We dream. But when things go badly we may default to our ethos of being "grace-oriented" and fail to hold people responsible for what they have (or, more often, have not) done. Because God has been gracious to us, we give ourselves a lot of (too much?) leeway to continue in a failing pattern. I see it in my own life--figuratively shooting the arrow and then drawing the bullseye marking around wherever it hits. There are times when plans fail, though, and we need to show ourselves and others grace. But there are other times when we must lovingly rebuke brothers and sisters for being poor stewards and exhort them to see the areas where they can and should improve to avoid similar results later.

I'm learning a lot in my Project Management class about how to overcome the many pitfalls that come along with working alongside complex human beings (especially engineers) on projects. More on that tomorrow...

Perplexed

My former pastor, who baptized me after he helped lead me back to Jesus, called me last week to return a voice mail message I left for him and his wife. he said that she was "gone," and I immediately thought, "Oh, no, she must have died." But the reality was equally horrific. Over the course of 48 years, little resentments had been allowed to fester. They were not addressed apparently, as my pastor recollects, "We never fought." His wife, a beloved friend and prayer warrior for us, divorced him quickly and moved out of state. It hurts me to see what the enemy is doing to try and destroy these two servant of God. If you read this, please pray for them--even though I'm not naming names. Pray for yourselves, that God will grant you discernement to know when "little things' need to be addressed and reconciliation is needed, so that you will never be surprised as my "grandfather in the Lord' was.

Feeling the Lostness of the Lost

Yesterday, at Faith Church of the Valley, Pastor John Salvatore preached about how to introduce others to Jesus, rather than hitting them over the head with logical arguments designed to trap them. At the end of the message, he let a video play in which a woman on a park bench bared her soul in a message addressed to Christians--"When are you going to have the courage to come talk with me and give me what I really need?" might sum it up well. I was very moved, and I believe God is doing some great things at this church.

Here's a link to another article that is compelling me today:

http://www.urbana.org/_articles.cfm?RecordId=831

last assessment day

Today, for the last time, I will join our org's assessment team in praying for and helping to determine our recommendations for candidates at our two-week school. I feel it has been a rewarding time, though not without some tense moments. I think it is hard to look other adults in the eye and essentially say, "We don't think you're ready for this yet," which is happening in a few cases. Yesterday, a session was held, named "Transformational Ministry," which sought to help people rediscover God's desire to change/sanctify them in the process of blessing Muslims. Refreshing. In the afternoon, we taught on and discussed healthy sexuality, and I think people were refreshed by our candor and willingness to address hard questions with them in dialogue.

Last night was a particularly refreshing time for me, as we worshiped together and took Communion, in a large circle. Confessions were made, sacrifices of praise were given, and my heart was truly stirred as I felt God prompting me to forgive others and myself and turn over my fears to Him. I felt like He really met me where I was, and He used one of the candidates, who's heading to a "hard" place, to pray with me. He blessed me more, I think, than I did him. I think I'm coming away from this week believing, more than ever, that God can indeed be trusted.

5th Day

Yesterday afternoon I took part in a meeting that might prove to be one of the most pivotal of the entire two weeks. A team of 4 psychologists give us their extensive reports on the candidates based on multiple personality tests and personal meetings. Though whether someone goes to the field is never based solely on the doctors' recommendations, we do take what they have to say seriously. It can be a very sobering time. Have to run now, but please pray for our assessment team, as we make some heady decisions. Want to share one more story with you that I recently found and edited: Frontiers worker “Nat” and his friends traveled outside their city to meet with their friend “Mustafa,” an elderly man who began following Jesus last year. He is one of the first believers among millions of unreached Muslims from his nation in Southeast Asia.

Nat felt God prompting him to share verses from 1 Peter and Isaiah 43 with Mustafa. He quickly learned why as he Mustafa shared how he had been battered by spiritual attacks, demonic dreams, and bizarre physical ailments since their last meeting. He told them, “When I used to follow Mohammed, life was easy enough. Now that I’m following Jesus, all kinds of things are happening to me.”

Nat writes, “He was a broken man, and, as he shared, our hearts broke for him.” Mustafa even asked, “What ceremony do I need to go through in case I want to stop following Jesus?” The brothers worshipped and prayed together, and Nat shared the two passages God had given him for Mustafa, who was touched and asked Nat to repeat them many times, including this one:

“Your adversary, the devil, prowls about like a roaring lion seeking someone to devour. But resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same experiences of suffering are being accomplished by your brethren who are in the world. And after you have suffered for a little while, the God of all grace, who called you to His eternal glory in Christ, will Himself perfect, confirm, strengthen, and establish you.” (1 Peter 5:8-10)

Before they left, Mustafa renewed his commitment to Jesus in a powerful way, and he begged them to visit more often. Nat writes, “We’ll do our best, even if only one or two of us can see him at times. Please also pray that God will call other [Muslims] to Himself from the same area where [Mustafa] lives, so that a growing fellowship can take root there.”

In Nat and Mustafa’s country, there are some wide open doors for Americans who wish to retire inexpensively. Many Americans are already transplanting businesses there because it’s so well-developed economically. Might God lead you to consider going to serve as a witness?

3rd day

God is doing some great work among the 52 adults and 30+ kids, and more than two dozen staff emembers taking part in Candidate School. I can see it in the creativity of people expressed through worship, in the sparkle of kids' eyes, in the excited voices of a Tucson couple I first met in 2004, and in myself, as my hope is being renewed. One of the couples I'm working with is going to join a team in Northern Iraq--the following is a recent story I penned, based on a team, email, about their efforts. I encourage you to laugh and cry at the goodness of God as you read what He's doing to help the hurting:
“Jane” and her husband, “Jim,” recently moved their church-based Frontiers team from a nearby country into Northern Iraq. Last month, while Jane was returning home from the bazaar with a friend, they managed to hail “the oldest taxi in the entire city.”

After climbing into the vehicle, their Kurdish driver quickly learned they were American, and he became intent on learning if they knew about an organization that helps kids with disabilities, like his own daughter, who has cerebral palsy. Jane offered to send “Sonja,” a physical therapist on the FRONTIERS team. When Sonja and Jane later arrived at his home, they were heartbroken to see his daughter, “Sadie,” lying on the floor of a 20 square-foot house, where she has been most of her life. No bed. No therapy. No hope. Until Sonja arrived.

The team leader, Jim, writes, “[Sonja] has been amazing and has [the family] on a program to help Sadie gain some control of her muscles. We’ve told them that [Sonja] can only go so far with Sadie – the One in whom we really hope is the One who will have to heal Sadie.” The team also purchased a car seat for Sadie, with straps to hold her upright.

After just a few weeks of therapy, Sadie’s condition has drastically improved, with her muscles getting stronger and an unexplainable peace covering her. Jim adds, “We of course know Who’s doing the real healing, and we pray that as [Sonja travels] to help her patients that God’s Spirit will continue meeting these people and heal them beyond their physical ailments.”

First day of Candidate School

It was a real blessing to be with more than 4 dozen (mostly 20s and 30s) young people today, in Candidate School, who are zealously pursuing full-time service among Muslims overseas. Today was mostly an orientation day, but it started out with some passion-filled worship involving kids and percussion instruments. By far, the best part of the day came during the last couple hours, when the candidates introduced themselves. I learned new things about the people I've been working with--like one of my AZ clients who is getting his doctorate in astrophysics and admitted today that he "almost" discovered a planet with the help of a gigantic telescope. Still, this family's highest ambition, it seems, is to share the gospel where it hasn't yet been heard. Maybe the Arab Gulf?

During lunch, my partner, Jan, and I met with 7 people we're responsible to assess/help during Candidate School. They hope to head out to Central Asia sometime in the near future. The 3 couples and one single woman all seem like very high qualified people to me. One man, whom his wife describes as a genius, admitted his apprehension at being psychologically assessed with the help of some psychological tests. He didn't want to be boxed into a category, he said. But when we explained that the personal meetings with counselors helped us to see whether the tests they took were accurate (trumping them, so to speak), he claimed he felt a "hundred times better." Praise God--some of these folks are under enormous strain, having just traveled here from great distances. They need prayer and encouragement, and I hope to stay well-stocked with it, so I can pour it out regularly.

Handling Different Interpretations of the Bible

The last couple weeks, at our church in tempe, our pastor has been teaching about Jesus' parable of the unjust steward, which is found in Luke 16:1-13. If you haven't read it, the following info. might not make a ton of sense. I have never completely understood the passage and was looking forward to hearing another interpretation. The messages he gave made some interesting points, but, on the whole, I disagreed with several of his assertions about Jesus' meaning, so the points he derived from the text are also difficult to swallow. Basically, he said that "make friends for yourselves by means of unrighteous money, so that, when it fails, they will welcome you into everlasting abodes" means that we're to strenghten our "salvation friendship with God" through the wise stewardship of our time and money. In order for this interpretation to stand, the "friends" and "they" are the Trinity, since God alone is able to welcome someone into an eternal abode. Hmmmm. I need prayer and wisdom before I open my mouth.

New Year Work Week

Last week, after Urbana, I took comp time and sick time (had some bronchitis) to catch up on time missed with Katherine, do a little housework, and just refresh myself before diving in again. We went to see a movie, Night at the Museum, which we both enjoyed, though it suffered from some big plot holes. Because of a deadline I'm trying to meet, I worked on getting the next Frontlines newsletter completed...it's looking beautiful thanks to our talented designer, Mark.

This week, I'm planning to do some work for International Director Rick Love - we're trying to launch his own website in the next week or two. Finishing Frontlines also. Writing a receipt letter for the org's January donors--which includes a story from the Muslim world. Also, I have a dinner event planned in Tucson this Friday night with Wycliffe Bible Translators. I'm hoping we get a lot of people there.

Just wanted to check in, so that people reading this won't give up. Now to the work! It's great to have some rest. God really knew what He was doing when he took some time off.

Feeling less bloated today than in my last post--more colorful and varied.