growing via adoption

Over the last 2 months, Kand I believe that God has been preparing
us to adopt another child. Here's why:



--On November 10th, K'sbirthday, we received a call from the same
adoption agency that helped us bring our daughter into our family. They said a boy had just been born, and they asked whether we would allow ourselves to be considered. This call came totally "out of the blue" because
we had not paid the agency their normal fee that normally causes them to
consider a family. They just remembered us and thought we might make a good
match. We said yes because we'd been hoping to adopt again, but then,
within a few days, the agency told us that this mother was not actually
intending to follow through with an adoption plan for her child. This was
hard news after getting excited, but it prompted us go ahead and get back on
the list at the end of November.



--On December 21st, we got another call from the adoption agency while we
were visiting K's family in San Diego. They asked again if we'd be
willing to adopt a boy that was due to be born on January 1st. They asked
permission this time because of some special circumstances-since we were
already on their list wanting consideration. We said yes again, and, almost
a week later, we learned that this family had chosen us to be the adoptive
parents. We were concerned because I was scheduled to be in St. Louis for
the Urbana conference from Dec. 26-Jan. 1, and we didn't want my girls
to be alone dealing with a new baby. But the baby was not born before I
headed home from this awesome conference, and we've been waiting for news
ever since. There has been absolute silence, though. We believe this family
has now changed its mind about making an adoption plan based on the amount
of time that has now passed since their last call to the adoption agency.
Please pray with us for this boy to be blessed by God with all that he needs
to live and thrive.



--On January 8th, as we were expecting to receive some news about adopting
the boy we talked about above, we learned some other startling news from our
adoption caseworker, Renee. On Dec. 17th, the Tucson branch of the agency
presented our profile to another expectant mother whose baby is due on
January 11th. Without knowing that we were officially "on hold" because of
the boy we were hoping to adopt, this birth mother chose us to become the
parents of her little one-we don't yet know the baby's gender. Yesterday, we
all went to Tucson to meet this expectant mother and her own mother, at the
agency office, so they could meet us and confirm this decision. They also
wanted to communicate their hopes for this child's future and the ways in
which they wish to remain in contact. This will be an "open adoption" with
ongoing communication between families. We have the same agreement with
Emma's birth-mom.



So, as you can see, we have been having a little adventure that's not quite
over yet. We are so excited to be given the honor of welcoming this new
child into our home, and we pray that he/she will be blessed by God through
us. Would you please pray for us this week?



--For this new child's health.

--For the family making the adoption plans to be blessed through this
process even as they deal with loss.

--For K and I to be a unified team as we begin to care for this baby
while communicating with the agency, birth family, and our own family. Ask
God to help us be good listeners and prioritize many different details well.

--Pray for our daughter because she'll probably be at home with her grandma for
several days while we're in Tucson for the birth. Ask God to prepare her
heart to welcome a new brother or sister.

--Please just celebrate with us this miracle of new life in our home by
praising God with us. Our hearts are just full of amazement and wonder at
the ways He has used these months of waiting, praying, and preparation to
bring us where we are now. He has strengthened us when we have felt very
weak and given us encouragement to wait for the child He intended to bring
into our family.



Lots of people ask us this question about adoption: "Can the birth family
change their minds?" The answer is yes and no. The state of Arizona mandates
that adoption papers cannot be signed until 72 hours after the time of
birth, so a different decision can be made during that time. However, after
meeting the birth mother and her own mother yesterday, we feel confident
that they have come to a certainty about this decision. After the papers
are signed, then they cannot change their minds. The adoption is basically
complete pending court approval of us as adoptive parents.



It's good to know you are with us in prayer, and we'll keep you updated and
make some photos available to you when we have some.



Yours in Christ,



Jeremy, representing the clan

a brief parable

No actual information about Microsoft is intended in the following story...

It's March 31, 2009 and Bill Gates has officially left Microsoft in great shape. Their stock is up higher than ever, they’ve left their competition, Apple and Linux, in the dust, and Windows software is selling like hotcakes. 90% of the developed world is now using Microsoft software. Before Gates left the company, he developed a manual for all the employees, teaching them how to run the company and outlining expected employee behavior. This manual became an unexpected best seller. Employees and competitors from around the world began to study it, memorize parts of it, and change the way they did business based on its principles. There was some dispute about the meaning of some portions of the manual, and people would define themselves and the way they did business according to what they felt were the most important parts of the manual. For instance, some people thought you shouldn’t be working on a certain day of the week while others thought it was another day, and still others thought it really didn’t matter as long as your intentions were good. It became the norm for employees to gather together once every week to listen while part of the manual was read and an advanced employee would interpret the meaning for them. Even children were taught from the manual in separate meetings. Some employees enjoyed this so much that they would meet together one or two more times to study and think about the manual. It was a rich source of wisdom. The purpose of all these meetings, so the employees thought, was to become better employees and thus improve the company and its image. They reasoned that if they knew the manual very well and obeyed its precepts then their neighbors would want to become employees too. Their company, Microsoft, would look great to the whole world and people would come flocking in...eventually.

However, for all of their studying and memorization, most of them did not grasp the primary reason why the manual was created by Gates in the first place. Yes, he wanted his employees to understand and enjoy his manual and not violate its principles. But the manual had been created to help the company complete a specific task after his departure. It gave instructions about how they were to do this, to whom, and even promised that Gates would take over again when this goal was reached. There were nuggets of wisdom throughout the manual that you could apply in many situations, but Gates was really expecting that his employees would use what he had written to expand Microsoft’s reach to every part of the world, so that every person would be able to learn about their products and become part of the organization. The employees who loved to have meetings about the manual saw this, of course--it wasn’t buried within the text. So they created a new department within the organization to make sure Microsoft kept expanding. Meanwhile, they spent most of their budget on meetings together and creating new meeting rooms for themselves. It became widely accepted practice for employees to see it as their job to attend 1-2 meetings per week, read the manual every day, and take another job in the meantime to support their family and lifestyle. Expanding the reach of Microsoft into places where the company wasn’t yet known became an extra activity an employee could do if they received lots of extra training and were willing to go find employees to fund their efforts from leftover income. Microsoft’s profits leveled off and started to decline a bit. There were many needs to fill and very few full-time employees left to meet them. The best they could hope for, they reasoned, was for people to keep showing up for meetings. They couldn’t reasonably expect them all to keep pursuing Microsoft’s goals all week long.

Agony and Blessing

Yesterday, I was running back and forth to the bathroom thinking I might have a kidney stone--I cried out to God as I chugged water and used some Ibuprofen to relieve my suffering. There's nothing like a bit of suffering to get your attention centered on relying on God.

This past week, we met with several friends who love us and vice-versa. Katherine made a dish with been, rice, and many kinds of Asian spices and served it to our grateful guests. We spent time praying with people, and my mother got the opportunity to hear how God orchestrated some of our friends from their first meeting Dec. 1 to their wedding on Dec. 18th. It's quite a story--made possible via Facebook. I got my first crown (upon one of my back molars), and I suffered minimal pain and felt blessed to have dental insurance, anaesthetic, and God's provision to afford the procedure, whereas so many others can't get the care they need. Also, Katherine had an MRI done on her knee that's been hurting, and we learned that the problem isn't a muniscus tear, which would have required expensive surgery--it's just a cyst, so maybe it will be small enough to deflate without huge expense. And our daughter, Emma, continues to amaze us with her joy and love of learning. God has been good to us, and I look forward to praising Him further this week.

Viewing Slumdog

I finally saw "Slumdog Millionaire," a new film by Danny Boyle, yesterday evening with a good friend. It was well made, an interesting, Dickens-esque story, somewhat suspenseful, had incredible music...but I don't know if I could bear to see it again. I'll ruin a little portion of the movie's plot now (rather than revealing the secret of the ending) to bring this up: showing kids getting hurt makes me nauseous and makes me feel angry--especially since what is practiced in the film's story actually occurs today in human slavery kinds of situations. It supposedly makes them more effective beggars. I saw evil revealed that I hadn't concerned myself with before, and I'm disturbed--not sure what I'm going to do about it yet either. I don't think it's the sort of thing you can just throw money at. But maybe there is some way to buy people out of slavery. Maybe adoption is an answer? I welcome comments...

Poem/Prayer by Sir Francis Drake

I was moved by this from 1577--hope you will be, too:

Disturb us, O Lord,
When we are too well pleased with ourselves;
When our dreams have come true, because we dreamed too little;
When we arrived safely, because we sailed too safely to the shore.

Disturb us, O Lord,
To dare more boldly;
To venture on wider seas;
Where storms will show Your mastery
Where losing sight of land, we shall find the stars

We ask you to push back the horizons of our hopes
and
to push us into the future, in strength, courage, hope, and love

This we ask in the name of our Captain, who is Jesus Christ.

If God wills...

I'm struggling a little theologically, and I think it's a good thing because I'm thinking about God a lot more and not making dumb assumptions. The topic on my mind is suffering, and there have been two voices in my life (one is from my church, while the other is John Piper) that are hammering the point that God not only allows and uses suffering to sanctify people, but He also intends suffering, plans the painful circumstances, and makes sure that suffering occurs in believers' lives. I could provide the links to these sermons, if anyone wishes. John 11 and the book of Job are used primarily to back up their points. I belong to a body of believers that's very concerned with God's sovereignty over all things, so if any suffering happens that opposes His will, that would be perceived as a threat to this aspect of who He is.

What troubles me a little is that a discussion has already been underway at my workplace, where church planters overseas are seeking to counteract what they term as "fatalism" among unreached people groups. For instance, in their countries, when a young person constantly makes stupid choices and dies on his motorcycle, since he wasn't wearing a helmet, his relatives console themselves with, "It is written." I myself have experienced some really crazy driving by foreign drivers, who keep muttering, "If it is God's will, if it is God's will..." as they make crazy, reckless moves into oncoming traffic. They reason that they may drive as bad as they wish because God's will is always going to be done, and they can't die until He wills it. Some of my co-workers want to counteract this philosophy and show that these deaths that keep happening could have been prevented. That they were not predestined.

I'm beginning to sense that I'm being called to adopt a few fatalistic principles--namely, seeing all suffering as God's will, in order to uphold the idea of God's sovereignty. In American Christianity, we don't call it fatalism, though. It's going to be called something more impressive because who wants to be known as a fatalist? I can tell you this--if/when my daughter gets sick, I'm planning to take her to the doctor, believing that God wants to heal her and use medicine, rather than passively waiting for the suffering she's going through to develop her character(?) take its full course and horribly weakens her. God has given me reason, and I'm going to assume, until I know differently, that He expects me to do everything in my power to fight against viruses and predators in her life and mine--even if they've been appointed, ultimately, by Him.

David and his buddy Saul

Last week, I flipped open the Bible hoping to get some kind of wisdom to light my way, and I read a couple chapters in 1 Samuel about the many chances David was seemingly presented in order to kill King Saul while the latter monarch was out constantly trying to kill him. It's almost comical. First, Saul goes to sleep in a cave where David and his men are hanging out; later, Saul chooses the one cave where David is hiding to enjoy his private bowel movement. Can you imagine lying still and quiet right next to the illustrious king while he's doing his business in the dark? Finally, David creeps into Saul's camp, gets all the way into the tent, and he still doesn't kill Saul. Because Saul was "the Lord's anointed," and David trusted that God would take care of Saul Himself. He didn't have to take matters into his own hands and bring sin upon himself.

I thought about how often I'll look at some opportunity that the Lord seemingly drops in my lap, and then I just assume that He wants to give me a gift, and I grab at it--not asking whether it's wise or sinful. It just looks good and easy, so I go for it. David chose not to sin and kill Saul even though it looked like God was repeatedly handing Saul's life over to David for an easy assassination. David waited and chose to suffer for years (choosing hardship for his family and men as well), then God exalted David and brought him into leadership over the country at the appointed time. I admire David's steadfastness and want to look at new opportunities presented to me...slowly. I don't want to kill any Sauls before their time, you might say (or I might).

Dying daily

Last year, I attended a funeral with my wife, Katherine, and we found it difficult to avoid cracking up during one of the "Special Music" moments performed by the departed lady's nephews and niece. You see, they mangled the lyrics of a fairly well-known song in a unique way. The song was by Fernando Ortega, titled "Give Me Jesus," and its performers are supposed to sing:
"In the morning when I rise, in the morning when I rise, in the morning when I rise, give me Jesus."
Instead, these mourning relatives obviously had something else on their minds, as they mistakenly sang (I kid you not): "In the morning when I die, in the morning when I die, in the morning when I die, give me Jesus."
The performance effectively ruined the song for us for the rest of our lives, as we find it pretty impossible to hear the song on the radio without singing along, "In the morning when I die!"
Then yesterday, I was thinking about Jesus' call for his followers to take up their crosses daily and follow Him, and I remembered that song, "In the morning when I die..." and realized that each morning I can choose to "die" to my own desires and perceived needs or live for myself and miss what God wants to give in place of what I'm grasping to own, build, and receive glory through. Having Jesus to fill me up makes it possible to die to self daily. Maybe God speaks to me through incidents like this, or maybe I'm making too much out of very little, but I know that the remade song speaks to me in a new way that most Christian music does not, so I praise God for it.

Lawrence of Arabia

I'm watching this film in pieces with my wife, Katherine (such is the norm in a family with a 7-month-old). Last night, we watched as T.E. Lawrence defied his Arab allies who claimed that the death-by-desertion (in the desert, no less) of a fellow Bedouin who fell off his camel was "written" in the heavens, so they felt no responsibility for going back to look for this one man who would surely die. If they did try, they reasoned, they would surely face the same fate. Lawrence decided to go back for this man who he barely knew--maybe to prove a point: when he returns victorious with the man he saved, he whispers out, "Nothing is written." Appeals to the humanist/rationalist side of me--in some quarters known as the flesh.

Offending and Being Offended

This last week, I took a phone call from a friend and leader at my church who wanted to explain why my church's elders had chosen not to promote a fundraising banquet that my workplace is offering in a couple weeks. The primary reason was an ad that appeared in the NY Times which has fallen under the attack of Dr. John Piper, so it is now getting considerable attention. The ad, which looks like a letter to Muslims, signed by many Christian leaders (including some from my org)--asks Muslims for forgiveness about the Crusades and encourages further dialogue to take place on the basis of Christians' and Muslims' shared tenet--that the One God expects us to love Him and love our neighbors.

The problem is that many Christians don't think Muslims have any real connection with the God whom Christians claim to follow. Because they don't trust in Jesus (yet) we have nothing in common. I happen to believe that Muslims have a lot in common with Jews who also do not accept Jesus as their Messiah. Jews would deny that Jesus is the "Christ" of God. My heart was gladdened that, when I read the NY Times response to "A Common Word," the Christian leaders correctly identified Jesus as the "Christ." I believe that, in doing so, they rightly proclaimed Jesus as the Anointed Son of God. If they had called Jesus a Prophet, equating Him with Mohammed, there'd be a big problem. They didn't go with a simple "Jesus" or "Jesus of Nazareth". His role is made evident, whether Muslim reders accept it or not. I think this was a bold choice that should not be overlooked.

Learning from Peers

This is the one weekend of the year when people from around the country serving as "encouragers of sent ones" come together to stir one another up for love and good deeds. It's a lot of material to devour, and it can be difficult to discern what key points to take away from all that's being taught...and what to ignore. Perhaps the best part of the weekend is being able to pray with others who actually know the challenges I face. I get to see that I'm not alone, that there's people ahead of me whom I can learn from, and remember that God is really in control.

I read John Mark's account of Jesus' death this morning, and I was struck again by Jesus' words, "My God, my God, why have You forsaken Me?" For years, this one verse has been used by Bible teachers I've heard to explain that Jesus was actually divorced from the Father at this time because the full weight of God's wrath was being placed upon Him, and, the argument goes, God's holiness does not dwell in the presence of sin. So here's my question: Was Jesus surprised and actually asking the question "Why" I don't think so. People who heard Him thought He was calling on Elijah. His words echo a psalmist prophesying about Jesus. If that psalm was originally breathed to the psalmist from Jesus, the Word of God, and I believe it was, Jesus was quoting Himself. Soon after He said this, He spoke to His Father, "Into Thy hands I commit My Spirit." That's in another book other than Mark, but it's trustworthy. In Matthew, the Father raises a bunch of people from the dead and causes an earthquake. So how is it that Jesus is claimed to have been abandoned by His Father temporarily? Can you use just one verse to prove it? If it is true that Jesus was "forsaken" for a while, as God was pouring the full weight of sin on Him at the same time, what theological point is upheld? Really, I want to know. Someone tell me. Is it just that God takes sin so seriously that He would not listen to His Son anymore? I want to know more about why it's so important to our faith that the Trinity would be temporarily ceased. And how long was it necessary for this forsaking to happen?

what drink describes you?

Today, I reconnected with a young man I knew and hung out a lot with between 1996 and 2000. I felt the need to apologize for being overbearing and exercising a strong personality over him, expressing many opinions that he probably could have lived without. He was gracious. But then I think, at the very same meeting, it seemed to me that I was falling back into the very same pattern--giving him lots of unsolicited advice. It was like i couldn't help myself. When I asked him afterwards if he had felt uncomfortable during our meeting, he said that I had mellowed a bit--that I was now like "Listerine...but the mint flavor". He later modified that flavor to orange, which sounded like an improvement. I appreciated his honesty and the chance to laugh at myself a bit. At least I wasn't Nyquil.

and another thing...

You might think--from reading my previous post--that I have my mind made up on this issue of whether Muslims worship the one true God of Abraham. I had a coversation yesterday with a pastor, and I asked him, "So do you also think Mormons worship this same God as we do?" He replied, "Certainly not," and he listed all the qualities about the god Mormons believe in--that he was created by a bigger God and there are many other--which negated any claim that they worship the God we claim as one and only. Then I asked him, "But Muslims don't believe in the Trinity or that Jesus was His only begotten Son...how is this so different from Mormons who say they believe in the God of Abraham but add lots of other doctrines?" The pastor said, for himself, that he was prejudiced against Mormons the way many Americans are prejudiced against Muslims. The pastor then talked about how most Americans have no real concept of the Trinity, that they cannot explain it, so, he argued, would we say they don't worship the one true God? I thought he had a point there. For the most part, I am willing to give American churchgoers the benefit of the doubt that they are worshipping the one true God--even when their view of His sovereignty doesn't align with mine or when they hold the Bible in lesser esteem. I usually talk and act like we're talking about the same Heavenly Father. Should I cease believing this? Should I test everyone's faith who doesn't attend my church or Piper's and not just assume their one true God is my one true God? How does Romans 1 and 2 play into all this, wherein Paul says that His invisible qualities are evident to all mankind, so no man has an excuse. If this is the case, should we assume that peoples from all tribes who attribute creation to one divine entity are referring to this God who made the heavens and earth--even if they think wrongly about them because they haven't yet heard about Jesus?

arguing on how to tell the truth to Muslims

I decided to add my voice to a theological discussion under way that involves several members of Frontiers--with whom John Piper has taken exception to. My friend, Dr. Rick Love, the former International Director of Frontiers, is one of the main persons in dialogue with Piper. A discussion began at this website, too, and I encourage you to check out this link and add your own voice. This link leads you right to the commentary, where I wrote today as JRL, but you should look at Justin's original article as well.

The Time is Fulfilled

Reading in the Gospel of Mark, I see that Jesus went to be baptized by John, and then the Father speaks, "This is my beloved Son in whom I am well pleased." What an introduction to ministry! As adopted sons of our Heavenly Father, we may also long for that kind of affirmation. Certainly, we long to hear "I am well pleased" from our earthly fathers. With the help of this spoken blessing, we may feel empowered to represent him/Him as we walk out into the wilderness, among people who don't like us, and to gather others around us (some of whom, like James and John, may need to leave their father behind along with the family business). Jesus didn't begin his real work without this public affirmation from His Father. I wonder how many of the people I am trying to encourage, who have a desire to start ministry overseas, are still waiting for some find of affirmation--if it's not forthcoming from their real father, could it come from someone else who's older in the faith and believes in them?

Wednesday

This afternoon, my team is headed to ASU's Hayden Lawn, and we hope to interact with students at a prayer tent--where people pray 24-7 for weeks. We want to help people pray for people groups that have not yet heard about Jesus.

After hosting a big conference like Take My Life, one of the last things my body wants to do is follow-up work with attendees, but it's a critical component. I need God's grace to help me complete what has been started.

Yesterday, I sat down with three members of the Development team to discuss the next issue of Frontlines, and there were some good ideas flying around the room as we talked about integrating the issue better with its online version. I would really like to complete this issue on time for a change and not grow weary in well-doing.

I have a beautiful and talented wife, an adorable daughter, and a church that loves the work I do. Plus, a workplace environment that's flexible and willing to allow new ideas to be tried (even if they fail)--a good thing once in a while despite what I wrote yesterday. For these things and, most of all, my Lord who wants to be known and already knows me intimately--I have so much wealth for which to be thankful. May the Lord be praised today as I listen for His voice and seek to walk into the good works He has planned in advance for me.

Renewal

I think that blogging won't get done unless I carve out 15 minutes to do it and it alone. For me, that time is 8:15am-8:45am. I want to share two stories:

1) I labored and was planning for several weeks, leading up to the Take My Life Conference (www.takemylife.org), about a large prayer tent my org was going to set up in order to help people at the conference pray for 24 hours straight. I knew that rain would prevent us from putting the tent up, and I checked the weather reports--clear skies predicted. The morning that we were set to erect the tent, clouds came and the rain poured down, so we had to scrap the tent and ask people to pray in a small enclosed prayer chapel instead. I'm not sure how many people did go there to pray, and the announcment was never made that people could pray all night. I thought about the verse in Proverbs 16--"A man plans his way, but the Lord directs His steps." The following week after the conference, I learned that our special guests, who are part of the 24-7 Prayer Movement and were helping to lead the conference...they had asked God to bring rain, as they see rain as a sign of His favor. Interesting.

2) Yesterday, I received some surprising news from a co-worker: a 2-week trip to Central Asia that he had been planning with 3 other couples has now been put on hold because the three couples said they weren't aware of the April departure time, and they weren't sure if the goals of the trip truly aligned with their own. I found this very curious just one month before the proposed trip was going to launch. My co-worker said, --"A man plans his way, but the Lord directs His steps." This time, though, in the way he applied the verse, it had the ring of an excuse for poor planning. Not that he was at fault--but someone somewhere (need to find ouut who) had failed to communicate clearly with the three couples, who we were hoping would emerge as future leaders overseas. Or else they blocked out the word "April" when they heard it and panicked when they realized February was coming to an end.

In the ministry I'm involved with, we pray a lot. We make a lot of plans. We dream. But when things go badly we may default to our ethos of being "grace-oriented" and fail to hold people responsible for what they have (or, more often, have not) done. Because God has been gracious to us, we give ourselves a lot of (too much?) leeway to continue in a failing pattern. I see it in my own life--figuratively shooting the arrow and then drawing the bullseye marking around wherever it hits. There are times when plans fail, though, and we need to show ourselves and others grace. But there are other times when we must lovingly rebuke brothers and sisters for being poor stewards and exhort them to see the areas where they can and should improve to avoid similar results later.

I'm learning a lot in my Project Management class about how to overcome the many pitfalls that come along with working alongside complex human beings (especially engineers) on projects. More on that tomorrow...

Perplexed

My former pastor, who baptized me after he helped lead me back to Jesus, called me last week to return a voice mail message I left for him and his wife. he said that she was "gone," and I immediately thought, "Oh, no, she must have died." But the reality was equally horrific. Over the course of 48 years, little resentments had been allowed to fester. They were not addressed apparently, as my pastor recollects, "We never fought." His wife, a beloved friend and prayer warrior for us, divorced him quickly and moved out of state. It hurts me to see what the enemy is doing to try and destroy these two servant of God. If you read this, please pray for them--even though I'm not naming names. Pray for yourselves, that God will grant you discernement to know when "little things' need to be addressed and reconciliation is needed, so that you will never be surprised as my "grandfather in the Lord' was.

Feeling the Lostness of the Lost

Yesterday, at Faith Church of the Valley, Pastor John Salvatore preached about how to introduce others to Jesus, rather than hitting them over the head with logical arguments designed to trap them. At the end of the message, he let a video play in which a woman on a park bench bared her soul in a message addressed to Christians--"When are you going to have the courage to come talk with me and give me what I really need?" might sum it up well. I was very moved, and I believe God is doing some great things at this church.

Here's a link to another article that is compelling me today:

http://www.urbana.org/_articles.cfm?RecordId=831

last assessment day

Today, for the last time, I will join our org's assessment team in praying for and helping to determine our recommendations for candidates at our two-week school. I feel it has been a rewarding time, though not without some tense moments. I think it is hard to look other adults in the eye and essentially say, "We don't think you're ready for this yet," which is happening in a few cases. Yesterday, a session was held, named "Transformational Ministry," which sought to help people rediscover God's desire to change/sanctify them in the process of blessing Muslims. Refreshing. In the afternoon, we taught on and discussed healthy sexuality, and I think people were refreshed by our candor and willingness to address hard questions with them in dialogue.

Last night was a particularly refreshing time for me, as we worshiped together and took Communion, in a large circle. Confessions were made, sacrifices of praise were given, and my heart was truly stirred as I felt God prompting me to forgive others and myself and turn over my fears to Him. I felt like He really met me where I was, and He used one of the candidates, who's heading to a "hard" place, to pray with me. He blessed me more, I think, than I did him. I think I'm coming away from this week believing, more than ever, that God can indeed be trusted.